is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
