How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
foreskin is a definite game changer
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
jump out the window naked night went bad
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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