i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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