Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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