I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
