Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
