i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We named our party play list daddy issues
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Randomize
