so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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