I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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