This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
and you fell through a lawn chair
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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