He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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