eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
