I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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