So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
