btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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