ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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