GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
