So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
so let's talk penis.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
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How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees