Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
