i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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