its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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