Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
