I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
