At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
