You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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