i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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