and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
