Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
It's Friday. Sex?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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