What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
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you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
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...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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