It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
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I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
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if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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