I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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