you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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