what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
