Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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