I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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