You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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