That's intense
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
