Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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