Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
In America we eat man semen.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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