and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
