He is an equal opportunity slut.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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