how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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