i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
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