i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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