what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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