You're so nebulous sometimes
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
