I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
