Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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