I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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