do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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