did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
